


Prurient

by Giglet



Category: Doctor Who
Genre: Hand porn, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-11
Updated: 2009-12-11
Packaged: 2017-10-04 08:53:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 451
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Giglet/pseuds/Giglet
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What is it with the Doctor and holding hands?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Prurient

"Right, then!" Rose demanded, playfully yet inexorably, "You know all about human sex and my love life. It's not like I'm asking anything really personal. Just tell me how Time Lords do it?"

"Rose, it's... it's hard to explain. I mean, we're not even mammals." He knew that breaking out the Venusian brandy had been a mistake.

"So...no bearing your young alive, right? And the women have no--" she made a gesture as though holding two cantelopes in front of her chest.

"Oh no, they do have very nice --" he mimicked her gesture " --just, they're more ornamental than, uh, functional. Um." How had he gotten himself into this?

"And you do have... like, women, right? Men and women? Or do you, I dunno, spontaneously split, or have five sexes or something? Come on, tell me about the birds and the bees, or whatever you have where you come from."

"Do you really care about where baby Gallifreyans hatch from?"

"Naw, not so much, really." She took another sip from her snifter and giggled. "Just tell me what you do for fun. Recreational sex, yeah?"

Oh hell. "It's not very interesting. Human sex is much more exciting."

"No, come on, I want to know."

"Look, Time Lords are very... stodgy."

"You're not stodgy."

"Yeah, and I never fit in there. Once I found Earth, I felt like I belonged there. I do like human sexual customs a lot," he said with an odd anthropological tone, which faded into sincere enthusiasm, "The whole making-out thing is fantastic."

"Which your folks back home, what, frowned on, kind of like you were going native?"

"More like, they thought it was completely unacceptable, kind of like I was a huge pervert."

"So why won't you tell me? When you're at home, what do you do for a fun time?"

The Doctor mumbled something.

"Say again?"

"We hold hands." He wouldn't look at her.

Rose gaped at him. "Hold... that's sexy? You mean you've been getting off, all these times, and I dint even know?!"

He looked away.

"That's, that's..." Rose counted up the times he'd reached for her hand, "and we were out in public half those times!"

He mumbled something that might have been, "...pervert."

She laughed and he looked at her, eyes wary.

"Are you mad?"

She shook her head. "It's a good thing you like human sexual customs, Doctor, because you so owe me. And you can start paying it back now."

"Really?"

"Really. Only... never, ever hold my hand in front of my mother."

"I wouldn't!"

"I'm not sure what you wouldn't do, anymore, Doctor." Her tone was amused. "Now get over here and start showing me what you can do."


End file.
